"Is it possible to know and ascertain whether a child is troubled, within 5-10 minutes the first time we meet him?" The answer is "maybe" and "definitely". The question I often ask seminar participants or the parents who are eager to learn and drilled me with questions about his son.
I will discuss these secrets now, a secret that I often use to analyze a child. Is he in trouble, even after studying carefully the future we can predict a child. Wow, this is not a closeout quiet promise, but this is uncertain. From the results of handling the various cases of families and individuals then formed an accurate pattern in each individual. Most of my clients if you have a problem, most of these problems and most of the problems that come from two things. It's also a secret (secret from my therapy room), but I'll run out unloading.
Troubled Children, Okay 2 things come from:
• Families (families that make up the problem by accident).
• The problem comes from the age of 7 years and under.
Six Characters Feature Troubled Children
Family, is an important factor in the education of a child. Character of a child from the family. Where the majority until the age of 18 years diIndonesia children spent 60-80% with the family. Humans differ from animals (maaf..) A new-born kitten, can live if separated from its mother, and many other animals that have similar capabilities. Humans can not, until the age of 18 years still need their parents and warmth in the family.
Success of a human being can not be separated from the "warmth in the family". It would be very much to be peeled from each year of human life and its needs and how to meet those needs, especially the emotional aspect. I will not forward it, we will discuss then on the other, now we return to find a way characteristic of children with conduct problems. Troubled Children
Ages 7 years and under? What's going on at this age? At this time most (85%) lies the problem or the origin of problems / barriers to a human being is created. The term term is Mental Block. Characters that menghabat achieving our personal goals. And usually will be felt at the age of 22 years and over. Woo ... segitunya? Yes Mental Block as a program that seemed to be prepared (due to lack sengajaan and ignorance of our parents) to inhibit various aspects of our lives. Aspects that can be a career (rich fear, fear of high office) health (body fat, allergy) Relationship (not easily matched with a partner / friend, paranoid) and other things, and many more.
Troubled Children : What is it about 7 years and under and around the first 7 years of human life? Let me explain, at this time we need, basic emotions that must be met to remember MUST be met. If during this pass and not met then, will happen Mental Block on the child. This is the origin of which is formed of Mental Block. Because the non-fulfillment of basic needs required by a human emotion. Needs of what is needed on the child's age? So fatal consequences (in adulthood the child) if the requirements are not met
There are three requirements that must be met in children aged 0-7 years and even more, this way is key in character education, so that the character of our children can grow and develop optimally. Besides these three things is the origin of the Mental Block that often occur or was very disturbing at the time the child is an adult. Troubled Children
1. The need for securityThree basic emotional needs must be met so that our children become a reliable person and has a strong character to face life. It will be very long at all if it is explained, well considering we discuss the traits - traits problem child then we will return to the topic. Troubled Children
2. The need to control
3. The need for acceptable
Actually there are six character traits of children with problems, enough that we see from the behavior that seems so, we are able to do early detection of "major disaster" future life to come (read: the more mature) and secepatnnya can make improvements.
This is the character traits are:
1. Unruly and deal withIt seems that most children will rebel, will own way, began to organize not want this and that. in this phase are eager to hold the child controls. Began there was a "rebellion" from within him. Things we can do is understand it and we should respond with a calm emotional state.
Remember the basic human needs? Three things I have mentioned above, now being experienced by the child's needs. We can only direct and supervise carefully. Troubled Children
2. Less open to the ParentWhen parents ask "How high school?" The child answered "ordinary course", replied with a lazy, yet curiously at his friend he was so open. Strange is not it? It is characteristic to the second, well at this time can be said parental figure replaced with others (friends or chairman of the gang, boyfriend, etc.). When this happens we as parents should introspect themselves and begin to change their approach to us.
3. Responding to negativeWhen the child begins frequently commented "Biarin wrote he was really ugly", a sign of self-esteem of children who were injured. Low self-esteem, one way to ascend to a higher place is to find a foothold, just as our self-esteem is low, the easiest way to raise our self-esteem is by criticizing others. And the child had been trained to do that, be careful of this. Self-esteem is the key to success in the child's future. Troubled Children
4. WithdrawWhen the children get used to and often Alone, preoccupied with his own duniannya, he did not want others to know about him (pull away). In this condition we as parents should immediately take the efforts of different approaches. Every human being wants to be understood, how to understand the condition of a child? Back to the 3 things I've described. In this condition the child usually feels like to be accepted as it is, understandably - semengertinya and deep. Troubled Children
5. Rejecting realityEver heard the quote like "I am not a smart person, I was stupid", "guns I could, I was stupid". This is almost the same as the number 4, that is the case of self-esteem. And usually the case (denial) come from the wrong discipline process. Example: "cook wrote nga so could you, my mama da love examples repeatedly".
6. Being a comedianAn incident at school when his friends laughed because his actions and the child is happy. If it occasionally may not be a problem, but if repeated he did not want to go back to my seat and looked for opportunities to seek recognition and acceptance from his friends then we as parents please be alert. Because the child did not get a taste acceptable at home, then where are the parents?
Thanks for read Troubled Children